Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’


1. Applying blush
The right way of applying blush is an important lesson to know. You start by finding the right color for you. You can do this by lightly hitting or “spanking” your cheeks, which will show you the same color you’d be if you were flushed from exercise. This is the color that you want. Now to apply it, use a brush that you don’t use for anything else, look in the mirror and smile to see where the apples of your cheeks are, and start brushing in a stroke form on the apples of your cheeks. Yes! You’re looking fabulous already.

2. Self defense moves
The knowledge of self-defense could mean the difference between life and death. Every woman should know how to protect herself effectively against attackers, rapists, or anyone else trying to do you harm. All you have to do is S.I.N.G. If you’ve ever seen the film Miss Congeniality, you may know what I’m talking about. S.I.N.G. stands for Solar Plexus, Instep, Nose, and Groin. Targeting any of these sensitive spots on the body will help hurt and eventually distract your attacker, giving you time to run away. Another helpful move is gouging of the eyes. Also, a hard punch, or elbow to the throat or side of the neck will cause the criminal to faint or lose consciousness for at least a moment. Just remember your goal is to get away safely, do it any way possible.

3. Letting him down easy
We’ve all heard the line “it’s not you, it’s me,” before. I have some better tips on how to call off your relationship. First of all you need to get your point across clearly. Don’t beat around the bush, be honest (but nice) and say that it just isn’t working out for you. Do not lie or make up some crazy story, again, honesty is key. Always, always, always break up with your boyfriend in person. How would you feel after being dumped on the phone, or even worse through a text message? Above all, remember to be polite but precise about your feelings.

4. Dealing with cramps
It’s that time of the month again and what presents do we get besides bloating and crankiness? Woman’s worst enemy: cramps. Luckily, there’s a few ways that us girls can cope with this pain, besides taking Midol, that is. Some things to try are a heating pad or hot water bottle on your stomach to help relax the muscles, mild exercise; such as walking or riding a bike, avoiding caffeine and alcohol; which just aggravates symptoms, and drinking a great amount of water.

5. Accessories
The number one rule for accessories that every woman should know is that less is more. You can wear statement earrings or a statement necklace, but not both. Your accessories should compliment the outfit and the color scheme of the outfit. To add a pop of color to a neutral outfit, try a colorful bag, pair of shoes, or scarf. Just remember not to go overboard on accessories.

6. Changing your own tire
Okay ladies, we can do this! It’s actually a very simple process. First of all and probably most obvious; make sure that your parking break is on and that the car will not roll. After you’ve completed that, get out your jack and find out where to place it. To find out this information you can look in your owner’s manual or on some cars there’s a mark behind the front wheel wells or in front of the rear wheel wells as to where to put it. Now, raise the jack so it is supporting the car. Remove the hubcap and unscrew and remove the lug nuts doing one then the one opposite of it until all are removed. Now you can remove the flat tire. Put the new tire onto the wheel studs with the air valve facing out. After that you can replace the lug nuts in the same pattern that you took them off (make sure they’re tight!). Put the hubcap back on and lower the jack. You’re finished! See, wasn’t that easy?

7. Finding the right bra size
Did you know that most women wear the wrong bra size? It’s very easy to find your right size. To start, wear a comfortable bra without padding. Take the measuring tape and measure around your chest right underneath your breasts. This measurement is your band size (if it’s an odd number then add 1″). Next, measure around your breasts at the fullest part. Take that number and subtract it from your band size. Every inch is a cup. For example, if the difference is 1″ then you are an A cup, 2″ is a B cup, 3″ is a C cup, and 4″ would be a D cup.

8. Bouncing back from a bad breakup
Getting dumped is never a good feeling. To get over him you need to start by not thinking about him. Don’t talk to him for now. Even if you would really like to, just don’t do it. Take anything that reminds you of him and put it away in a box in the closet. Out of sight, out of mind, they say. Now, you need to distract yourself. Go out and have fun. Do things that you’ve always wanted to try. Mix and mingle. Who knows, you might even meet a new guy. If after all this you’re still very upset about the break-up, then talk to a close friend and get everything off your chest, letting it out feels good and works wonders on emotions. Last, but not least, move on. Realize that if he doesn’t want to be with you the two of you may be not meant for each other. There’s plenty of fish in this sea we call the world. Get out there and find a guy who will treat you right!

9. Telling if he’s boyfriend material
Some women have a hard time spotting a loser. He may seem like a 10 at first, but then he slowly let’s the low-life creep out of him. First of all, is he gentlemanly? Being gentlemanly would include being polite to you, of course, and everyone else. If he’s nice to you but extremely rude to a waiter or server at a restaurant he may just be a mean guy and will show you that side of him eventually. What do you two chat about? A real gentleman is interested in you and your interests, not talking about himself the whole time. How about the check, does he expect you to pay? A courteous man would offer to pay, unless you already agreed to split the bill, making you pay is a definite sign of a loser. You can tell right off the bat if he’s a loser by the way he treats his mother or sister. Bad-mouthing them or being a jerk to them on the phone is probably your cue to leave. Dump that zero and find a hero.

10. Sunscreen is your best friend
Ah, the magical powers of sunscreen. Not only does it protect against skin cancer, but it also helps anti-aging. Applying sunscreen every single day is what will help you have the beautiful young skin you want, forever. Doctors recommend wearing sunscreen every single day, even if it’s not so sunny out. Those nasty UV rays still get through, rain or shine.

11. Staying safe online
Today, in the age of Facebook and Twitter, it’s very easy to slip up and give away some precious information. Posting information, such as your address, where you are, or when you aren’t going to be home, can be remarkably dangerous. Posting your status on Myspace as “In Hawaii until Thursday!” is actually saying, “Come rob my house! I’m not home!” Be smart about what you say and what details you give on the web. Make your web page private and so only people you know can see what you post. If it’s not private always ask yourself, would I tell this to a complete stranger?

12. Staying happy at your job
If you’re at a job that used to seem great, but has long since lost it’s appeal and there’s no other job opportunities out there, then make the best of it. Try being more social. Forming relationships at work will make you look forward to seeing your co-workers and give you a better working environment. Speaking of environment, what’s your work space like? Make it cozier by adding a few of your own touches, like a photograph or a plant. Maybe the problem at your job is that you’re not being challenged enough. Ask your boss for more or different work to do, this may help stimulate your brain causing you to be more entertained. Also, allow yourself a little bit of free time. Check your email or IM a friend for 15 minutes a day in between working.

13. Fighting that hangover
So your drinking got a little out of hand last night. You don’t know much except you luckily ended up in your own bed. What you do know is now you have a pounding headache and feel extremely queasy. What do you do now? Start by calling in sick, nobody will question you if you say that you have the flu. Now, drink up. Alcohol makes you dehydrated so avoid caffeine, which will add to the dehydration, stick to large amounts of water and juice. Eat light foods (if you can eat at all), such as crackers. Go back to sleep then repeat.

14. Acing the interview for your dream job
It’s the job of your dreams and you’re nervous about the interview. Well, don’t worry, I have your back. Make sure you start your day off well; get a good nights sleep, eat a healthy, but filling, breakfast, and get up on time. Research about the company or business that you are trying to work for, the interviewer will be impressed that you did your homework. Stay confident. Confidence can make a huge difference; your future boss will be able to tell that you are confident in yourself and your abilities. Be professional, dress the part and always be polite. Most of all, be yourself.

15. Planing the perfect party
Throwing the perfect bash is hard work, but very worth it in the end. Plan early so you will be sure that you have enough time for all the preparations. Some things to think about include; what kind of party, the invitations, who to invite, where it will take place, where your guests will park, the hors d’oeuvres, the beverages, the seating, the atmosphere and lighting of the venue, coffee for later, and of course all of the little details. If all of this is overwhelming try having a friend help you out.

16. Falling asleep without counting sheep
There are those nights when you just cannot fall asleep. Well I’ll tell you what you can do to help with this problem, sheep free. Keeping a regular sleep schedule helps you to fall asleep right on time every night. Not eating or exercising can be beneficial also; both of which keep you awake longer. Some people say reading a book helps them doze off. If you have a lot on your mind and can’t seem to sleep, try writing down your thoughts. Knowing that you won’t forget in the morning can put you at ease and let you catch some Z’s.

17. Flirting
Some women just don’t have “game” when it comes to flirting with men. You have to let a guy know that you’re into him if you ever want him to make a move. To do this, be calm and laid back, nobody likes someone who tries too hard. Break the touch barrier by lightly touching his arm when you laugh at his joke or picking some lint off of his shirt. Compliments really work wonderfully. Make sure they are sincere ones, though. Make eye contact and hold it for longer than you normally would, he’ll know something’s up.
Talk about his interests, try to get to know him, he’ll know that you are interested.

18. Managing time
Time management is definitely a life-saving skill to know. Planning ahead is the most important thing that you could do. Second most important, would have to be prioritizing. Decide what you need to do in which order, what has to be done by when and what can you hold off on? Set goals for yourself, this will help you stay on task because you’ll want to accomplish them. Organizing your environment and keeping a planner will also help you manage your time.

19. CPR
Be a hero, know your CPR. To start, check the person for breathing, by tilting their head back. If there is no breathing then you start mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Plug their nose and cover their mouth with yours and breath 2 breaths into them, each breath being about 1 second long. Now look for responsiveness; breathing, coughing, or moving should occur, if not, start chest compressions. Place your hands in the middle of the person’s nipples and pump your hands up and down 1 ½ inches to 2 inches with each pump being less than 1 second. Do this 30 times. Repeat both steps until help arrives.

20. Putting on a condom on your partner
A very important lesson: putting on a condom. It can save you from sexually transmitted diseases and unplanned pregnancy. First of all obtain a condom; from the store, a doctor’s office, or a clinic, like Planned Parenthood (they’ll give you a ton for free!). Now to put it on your partner, just place the condom on the head of the penis, holding the tip of the condom with your fingers, and roll it up all the way. Voila! You’re on your way to safe sex.

21. Complimenting someone
Not only do compliments make the person you’re giving them to happy, but they make you happy too. Compliments are like giving a gift for no reason, which always a great experience. To compliment someone be sure to stay sincere. Be specific with your compliment, a certain piece of jewelry that you like is better than an all over compliment, it will show that you actually noticed them. To make a compliment really strong add why you like it, for example, I like that shirt, the color really brings out your eyes.

22. Preventing heart disease
Heart disease is the number one killer of woman in the United States. Luckily there are many ways to prevent it. Tobacco and stress contribute massively to heart disease so try your best to stay smoke-free and de-stressed. Having a good diet will help too, you are more likely to have heart disease if you have high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol, or are obese. And, of course being active is a great help to prevent many diseases including heart disease.

23. Detecting if someone is lying
Knowing when someone is lying is extremely helpful. Look at their body language, it can tell you a lot. Are they making eye contact? If not, that’s a bad sign. Are their hands touching their face, throat, or mouth? Do their actions and gestures match their emotions and expressions (such as frowning when saying something happy, or saying that they love a gift but smiling after saying it, like it was planned)? If no to those two questions, then you’ve got a liar on your hands.

24. Washing your face every night before going to sleep
The best advice my mom ever gave me was wash your face every single night before going to sleep. Leaving the days makeup and oil on your face will clog pores causing breakouts and nobody wants that. Always remember to wash up!

25. Self breast exam
Spotting breast cancer early on can save your life. You always do a self-breast exam lying down. When checking your right breast, place your right palm under your head and use the left hand to check. Use the pads of your three middle fingers and go in a circle motion overlapping to check for bumps. You’ll need to use different types of pressure; light for the tissue closest to the skin, a mild pressure for deeper, and firm pressure to feel the tissue closet to the chest and ribs. To make sure you check the whole breast, go in a line down the breast then a line right next to that line and so on. Repeat on right side. Call your doctor immediately if you find anything.

 
Original Source: http://smaknews.com/Need-to-Know/25-life-saving-tips-every-woman-should-…

Read Full Post »


Absolutely LOVE this list… It’s definitely something every women should read about men!

  1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.  If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.
  2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
  3. Allow your intuition to save you from heartache.
  4. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be
  5. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
  6. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t “be friends”. A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
  7. Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
  8. Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
  9. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
  10. If something bothers you, speak up.
  11. You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within.
  12. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are… even if he has more education or has a better job.
  13. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
  14. Never let a man define who you are.
  15. Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you.
  16. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
  17. All men are NOT dogs.
  18. You should not be the one doing all the bending… compromise is a two way street.
  19. You need time to heal between relationships… There is nothing cute about baggage… Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship
  20. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you…
  21. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complementary… Not supplementary.
  22. Dating is fun… Even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right.
  23. When a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him – he takes it for granted.
  24. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need.

 

Share this with other women and men just so they know… You’ll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices, and another woman prepare, and a man aware. ~Oprah

What do you ladies think — do you agree with this list? Would you add anything else?

Source: http://girlsguideto.com/article/24-things-women-should-know-about-men

Read Full Post »


If you’re married or in a serious relationship, you’re no stranger to the phrase, “I love you.” You can say those 3 little words to your partner one million times, but we all know that it has to be followed up with action.

Showing love isn’t an exact science. We all speak different love languages, so you may show love in a way that your spouse doesn’t understand (and vice versa).  Well, it doesn’t have to remain that way.

Happy couples’ love for each other and dedication to the relationship lead to many adjustments in the way they show love to each other. If what you’re doing isn’t working for your relationship, it may be time to change your approach.  Use this list of 75 ways to show love as a guide to loving your mate in a way that may save your relationship or just take it to a new level of awesomeness.

1. A kiss on the forehead
2. Uninterrupted quality time
3. A note under the pillow
4. Tell him when he looks masculine, sexy, or hot
5. Turn a regular day into an All-About-You day just for your mate
6. Breakfast served in bed
7. A romantic picnic indoors
8. An unexpected dinner cruise
9. Propose marriage on one knee
10. Don’t complain when he leaves the toilet seat up
11. A rose on the pillow
12. Tell her she’s beautiful
13. Pour on the chivalry (open doors, pull her chair out)
14. A bubble bath with rose petals and her favorite scented candles
15. Verbalize what your relationship means to you
16. Surprise her with her favorite flowers and candy
17. An “I love you because…” list
18. PDA (public displays of affection)
19. Heart shaped pancakes or cookies
20. A walk in the park together
21. Hold your beloved a little tighter and longer than usual
22. Do some of his/her chores
23. A handwritten card sprayed with your scent
24. Spoil each other
25. Renew your marriage vows
26. Be first to say “I’m sorry” after an argument
27. Personalize (i.e. engrave) gifts
28. Place an “I love you” flyer under the car’s windshield wiper
29. Send a surprise gift to his/her workplace
30. Support each other’s dreams
31. Make love slowly, passionately
32. Run his bath water
33. Give your spouse space when needed
34. Buy her feminine hygiene products (before she asks)
35. Bring him a cold beer while he watches football
36. Put a love note in her purse
37. Hold hands
38. Take showers together and wash each other’s back (or whole body)
39. Look deeply into your lover’s eyes
40. Always kiss goodbye and goodnight
41. Boast about your mate and your relationship to mutual friends
42. Arrange for a babysitter so you can have an unexpected date night
43.  Say how much you love each other even if you think it’s known
44. Use cute pet names for each other
45. Rub your noses together
46. Remember to say thank you (often)
47. Excuse each other’s mistakes
48. Meditate together
49. Sleep in his t-shirt
50. Wash her hair
51. Step outside of traditional gender roles to help each other (Cook dinner for her; take the trash out for him)
52. Verbally reassure your lover
53. Take photographs as a couple
54. Give up the last piece of food on your plate
55. Write a short fairy tale using you and your mate as the characters (Once upon a time…”)
56. Listen more intently
57. Flirt with each other
58. Sing your significant other a love song
59. Get up early to help him/her get ready for work
60. Say “I adore you”
61. Watch a chic flick with her
62. Kiss your mate somewhere you never thought to kiss before (i.e. elbow, knee, toe)
63. Initiate affection (hugs, kisses, spooning)
64. Take good care of yourself so that you’re at your best for the one you love
65. A handmade gift or card
66. Write a sweet message on a fogged-up mirror so he/she will see it after exiting the shower
67. Cook your significant other’s’ favorite meal
68. Feed each other chocolate covered strawberries
69. Cuddle by the fireplace
70. Laugh and have fun with each other
71. Rub his/her feet
72. Create a scrapbook together
73. Start a hobby together
74. Dance indoors to your favorite song
75. Ask about each other’s day

Healthy relationships survive because both partners keep trying. They know the secret–that love is a verb. Loving your spouse or lover means taking action to help keep love (the feeling) alive and flourishing.

Source: http://blog.self-improvement-saga.com/2010/09/ways-to-show-love/

 

Read Full Post »


Yes, I know Valentine’s Day is over, but that’s no reason to stop showing your love! Since romance is in the air, I think I’ll be posting some more relationship and love based posts, along with the usual ones.

Read Full Post »


Red-flags in relationships she’s learned along the way: (From Vogue)

1. “If someone doesn’t seem to want to get to know me as a person but instead seems to have kind of bought into the whole idea of me and he approves of my Wikipedia page? And falls in love based on zero hours spent with me? That’s maybe something to be aware of. That will fade fast. You can’t be in love with a Google search.”

2. If a dude is threatened by the fact that I need security, if they make me feel like I am some sort of princessy diva – that’s a bad sign. I don’t have security to make myself look cool, or like I have an entourage. I have security because there’s a file of stalkers who want to take me home and chain me to a pipe in their basement.”

3. “If you need to put me down a lot in order to level the playing field or something? If you are threatened by some part of what I do and want to cut me down to size in order to make it even? That won’t work either.”

4. “Also I can’t deal with someone who’s obsessed with privacy. People kind of care if there are two famous people dating. But no one cares that much. If you care about privacy to the point where we need to dig a tunnel under this restaraunt so we can leave? I can’t do that.”

Read Full Post »


Dear readers,

I decided to start a blog about my boyfriend’s and my relationship when I found out we would be taking it long-distance. I thought that someday, it might be nice to look back and see how it went, in terms of thoughts and maybe it could even help other couples going through the same sort of things. So that’s all this is; a collection of photos, graphics, stories, and diary-type entries. Feel free to comment, ask questions, or just plain read through the blog. It is however, a work in progress. Soon I hope to have fun links, helpful advice, and more.

http://loveandseparation.wordpress.com/

Read Full Post »


When your man is stressed out, you both suffer. Not to worry — these sweet, pampering moves will send Mr. Cranky Pants packing… and earn you major girlfriend brownie points.

By Jennifer Benjamin

Sure, stress sucks for him, but it’s no picnic for you either. When something is eating at him — whether he’s had a bad day at work, money is tight, or his favorite team just lost a big game — he doesn’t have the energy to give your relationship the attention it deserves. "Stress is a major stumbling block for couples," explains JoAnn Magdoff, PhD, a psychotherapist in private practice in New York. "It’s difficult to feel connected to your partner when he’s anxious or distracted."
Of course, you could just plop him down in front of the TV and wait for the storm to pass, but we have a much better solution. Treat your guy to a few stress busters that will help him return to his former, fun self.

 

1. Treat His Feet

Giving your man a foot rub probably doesn’t fall too high on your list of favorite things to do, so the fact that you’re even offering it lets him know just how much you care. Plus, it feels damn good. "We hold a lot of tension in our feet that connects to other spots on our bodies, so working out the kinks there can help relax us all over," says Jamie Ahn, owner of Townhouse Spa in New York City.
Her tips for giving the ultimate foot rub: First, pop a small, damp washcloth in the microwave for a minute. Find a cushy spot where you’ll both feel comfortable, and have him lie down with his feet in your lap. Then use the toasty washcloth to cleanse his feet, which will warm the area and, for your sake, eliminate any foul odors.
Rub a half dollar-size dollop of an essential oil or body lotion in your hands, grasp the arch of his foot with one hand, and rotate the foot in circles, moving clockwise to the right, down toward you, up to the left, and back toward him to loosen up the joints and muscles. Next, take both thumbs and move them up the bottom of the foot, from the arches to the toe pads and outward. Repeat multiple times.
Between kneading moves, intermittently take your hands and gently glide them all over his foot and up and down his calf. Lastly, gently pull each toe. Then give the other foot the same treatment. Once you’re finished, clean his feet once again with a warm, damp washcloth.

2. Whip Up Some Comfort Food

If you are overwhelmed, you might want to curl up on the couch with a box of chocolates and a bag of buttery popcorn. Men, on the other hand, usually want a hearty, stick-to-the-ribs meal, though they may not even be cognizant of the fact. So it falls on you to create home-cooked fare he will love. "When it comes to comfort food, the simpler, the better," says Food Network chef Dave Lieberman, author of Dave’s Dinners. "The classics, like chicken soup, steak, and mashed potatoes, are always winners…and even better, they are easy to make."
The presentation should be equally fuss free. "You don’t even need to bother setting the table," adds Lieberman. "Just bring out what you need and put it on the coffee table so it doesn’t feel labor intensive and there’s no pressure for it to seem like a special occasion."
A few Dave-recommended menus: roast chicken with mashed potatoes, pan-grilled rib-eye steak with sautéed spinach, and pasta with a hearty meat sauce and garlic bread.

3. Tuck Him In

No, you’re not his mother, but if you see him sleeping on the couch or passed out on top of his bed, throw a blanket over him. This nurturing move brings him back to a kidlike place subconsciously, when paying rent or getting ahead at work didn’t weigh so heavily on his mind. There’s also a bonding benefit.
"Even in a sleep state, he’ll feel a surge of affection from your caring gesture," says Yvonne Thomas, PhD, a Los Angeles psychologist specializing in relationships and self-esteem. "You’re making him comfortable, keeping him warm, and showing him that you pay attention to what his needs are."

4. Make Music

"Music is one of those rare channels that allow men to express their feelings more naturally, whether they’re playing air guitar or even singing," explains Magdoff. "It helps them get out any mindset." When he pops in a playlist, he mentally transports himself back to a great concert, spring break, or his first date with you.
To help bring him to that feel-good mental state, have him lie down, and plug his headphones into your iPod. While you’re both lying there, scroll around, playing stuff that will make him smile. "It’s an instant mood-lifter and an opportunity to show just how well you understand him by choosing songs you know he loves," says Thomas.

5. Cross a Chore Off His To-Do List

No one enjoys ironing shirts, doing laundry, or cleaning the bathroom, so if you jump in and do it for him at a particularly stressful time, he’ll be eternally grateful — especially since the burden of all the things he has to do may be stressing him out even more. "By dealing with one of his mundane tasks, you’re taking some of the load off of him," explains psychoanalyst Gail Saltz, MD, author of Anatomy of a Secret Life. "It’s also a labor of love that shows him you’re invested in making his life easier in whatever way you can."

6. Have Just-for-Him Sex

If there’s one thing that’s guaranteed to put a man at ease, it’s a mind-numbing sexual release. Unfortunately, he often is so caught up in making sure you orgasm, he stresses himself out even more. "Guys become so concerned about performing for you, they’re not able to enjoy the sexual experience as much," says Dr. Saltz. "Obviously, you like him to ante up for you, but occasionally, he’ll appreciate sex that’s all about him and his pleasure."
So tell your guy: "Since you’re always such a rock star for me in bed, I’d like to return the favor and tonight just make you happy." Not only are you giving him a free pass, but see how we threw a little ego boost in there as well? You can further alleviate any pressure to please you by offering him oral sex instead of intercourse.

7. Give Him a Warm Wake-Up Call

No noise is worse than the sound of your alarm clock jarring you awake on a weekday morning. A more pleasant alternative is rousing him yourself. As soon as you hear his alarm sound, quickly reach over and switch it off (it’ll be easier if it’s already on your side of the bed). Then make him a cup of coffee, and bring it to him. "You’re starting his day off with a warmer, softer approach, which sets a more relaxed tone for the rest of the day," says Dr. Saltz.

8. Add a Special Touch

Maybe you already do nice things, like making his bed or cracking open a cold beer for him so he doesn’t have to get off the couch. "But once it becomes a habit, it loses some of its effect, so sometimes, put a twist on it," explains psychologist David Niven, PhD, author of The 100 Simple Secrets of Great Relationships.
Some sweeter-than-usual suggestions: Top off his bowl of ice cream with crumbled bits of cookie, put a dash of cinnamon or cocoa in his morning coffee, or leave his beer mug in the freezer all day so it’s iced by the time he gets home. "These treats are not only thoughtful, but they give him permission to indulge and live his life, rather than worry about his waistline," adds Thomas.
You don’t have to go the food route either — maybe replace his everyday shaving cream with a high-end, luxe brand or throw his towel in the dryer right before he gets out of the shower so it’s nice and heated up when he wraps it around his body.

9. Create Sudsy Fun

Speaking of showers, when your brain is fried and your muscles are tense, sometimes the best thing is a hot shower or bath. And it’s even better if you join him.
"Water has relaxing, therapeutic properties already, and when you enter into the equation, it becomes a sensual experience as well," says Dr. Saltz. "You can pamper him, and possibly even put him in the mood, by getting the shower or bath ready, making sure the water is warm, and setting out sexy-smelling bath oils." Also, let’s not ignore the fact that you’ll be buck naked the whole time. That’s a surefire way to help him forget about his hectic day.

10. Play Hooky

When was the last time you two spent an entire Saturday or Sunday indoors, doing nothing but watching movies in your pajamas? Sounds good, right? "In our fast-paced world, we feel the pressure to be productive all the time," explains Thomas. "That’s why it’s so important to lock yourself away every now and then; and if you do it as a couple, it feels fun rather than antisocial."
So rent a whole bunch of light, brainless flicks that you will both enjoy (like comedies and action films — skip the documentaries on the world’s various problems). "The point is to give your mind a break, not overwhelm it with more anxiety-provoking thoughts," says Thomas. Then hole up at your pad all day, completely guilt free. Consider this an essential opportunity to recharge as a couple.

 

source: www.cosmopolitan.com

Read Full Post »


A new study from Purdue University found that when men feel they’re being treated unfairly, they gain more weight over time than women do. The researchers suggest that guys get pudgy because being treated poorly stresses them out, so they’re likely to turn to food for comfort. Here are five things you might be doing that give him major anxiety—and how you can keep him sane (and slim) without sacrificing your own peace of mind.

By Carolyn Kylstra

Read more: What Stresses Men Out – Things Women Do That Bother Men – Cosmopolitan

1. You Hold a Grudge

People whose partners recover well from fights report higher relationship satisfaction, according to research published in the journal Psychological Science. Unfortunately, the reverse is also true: When you hold on to and keep bringing up past beef, even after the fight is supposedly resolved, your dude is going to be unhappy in the relationship.

Do This Instead: When you’re having an argument, address only the specific problem at hand, and resist bringing up issues in the past or perceived patterns of behavior based on one or two unrelated incidents. To that end, avoid the words never or always, as in, “You never want to hang out with my friends,” or “You always forget to take out the trash.”

2. You Issue an Ultimatum

Fighting is never fun, but fighting dirty drives him totally coo-coo. Researchers from Baylor University found that the way a person perceives his partner’s emotions during an argument impacts how he feels. Specifically, when he senses that you’re trying to assert power (by being hostile, critical, blaming, or controlling), he takes it as a threat—which triggers major stress on his part. Delivering an ultimatum is the prime example of you trying to dominate the relationship: Do this, or I’ll leave you. It leaves him feeling powerless…and furious.

Do This Instead: Explain how his actions affect you, rather than issuing an order. Say something along the lines of, “It makes me feel like you don’t care about me when ______.” Besides, wouldn’t you rather he fix his mistakes because he wants to, rather than because he has to?

3. You Give Him the Silent Treatment

That same Baylor University study discovered that people get upset when their partners act distant and cold. Freezing him out makes him feel neglected, another source of stress.

Do This Instead: If you’re the type of person who needs to clear her head before you have a serious talk, tell him straight up that you need a breather, give him a specific length of time (fifteen minutes, one day), and then promise that you’ll discuss the situation at the end of that time.

4. You Bite His Head Off After a Long Day

Surprisingly, guys are a lot more vulnerable to relationship ups and downs than women are, according to a Wake Forest University study. Researchers believe it’s because women have an outlet to express their concerns—we turn to our friends—whereas for guys, their significant other tends to be their primary source of intimate conversation. So when you’re acting a little bit nutty, he has no one to turn to talk about it.

Do This Instead: Check yourself before you snap at him for something silly. Are you actually stressed out or annoyed for an unrelated reason, like work or friend drama, and just taking it out on him? It might seem like not a big deal, but when you let your feelings run wild, you may end up hurting him more than he lets on.

5. You Play It Too Cool

You already know that acting needy is a turn-off…but pulling away too much can also backfire. Recent research published in Psychological Science reveals that couples get rocky when one person’s commitment level is different from the other’s. While it’s true that not returning his text for a day or two will pique his interest if you’re still in the early dating stages, once you’re in a committed relationship, it’s just going to make his cortisol levels skyrocket.

Do This Instead: Ditch the games, especially after you’re official. While it’s definitely good to have your own life apart from him (weekly girls’ night, spinning class, etc.), the only time it makes sense to purposely distance yourself is if he’s pulling away a bit. In that case, creating some space ups a guy’s interest; any other time, it just makes him feel anxious and confused.

Read more: What Stresses Men Out – Things Women Do That Bother Men – Cosmopolitan

Read Full Post »


tumblr_lcm1f1sVmK1qephgeo1_500

Read Full Post »


I came across this post on Going Bullseye and simply adored it. It matches my perspective perfectly, and makes some incredibly smart points. Breakups are hard, yes, but we can get something out of each and every experience we go through, good or bad.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with things. When some people break up it takes them a while to wrap their head around it. The thought of someone who used to be a huge part of your life now being completely gone from your life, is sometimes the hardest part. You go through different stages of being sad, mad, dramatic, trying to replace them, etc… etc… Some people, however, don't go through this. They just simply let it go. It may hurt t … Read More

via Going Bullseye

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »

%d bloggers like this: